Include my voice

The absence of Foreplay and Consensual Sex for the women of the world!!!!

Now you will forgive me for my language but I am  just plain angry on this article. How did the rape of Damini happen?  How did six men rape a woman in a moving bus for an hour? As an activist,  I keep trying to replay her rape in my mind, I so much want to understand why these attackers decided to rape her on that particular night. What was the conversation leading to the rape? Was the rape in the moment? I’ll be a bitch and ask what was she wearing was it provocative (since it’s their common excuse anyway). I have worked with rape victims in my line of work and there is nothing that is as destroying as failing to comprehend what happened to a victim in order to assist her. I feel frustrated because I can’t envision what happened to Damini. (her provisional name)

So yesterday I was working burning the midnight oil hoping to finish what I was doing that night. I wasn’t going to sleep till morning at all. So I decided to go through my newsfeed and there was the link that shattered my hope into pieces. The woman I had been praying for  was dead yet ever since I  got wind of the story I so much wanted her to live ,to eat normally again even thought she had lot a greater percentage of her intestines. To live and see justice..I rose from my bed where I was working from and started walking around the house. Suddenly I didn’t feel safe anymore. Something was not right. I was having panic attack from the anger; the torture of the mind that did not dare imagine how something like that would have happened.

 They say her brain was severely damaged due to the trauma but being that woman who treasures her vagina so much I wondered what that vagina went through. From the labia to the uterus, to the fallopian tube, ripping it off straight to the intestines. Six penises are a big number for one vagina in the moment I think. At this point we dare not think about their sizes- thickness and length, their state of decorum-cleanlines, HIV status Etc,.. To then use an iron rod. Ha hey!!! No No No  No No we can’t have that happening to any living being!! I cried and crawled around the house. Fortunately I was home alone. So I wailed for about an hour and went to sleep with a head ache.

Lest we forget her partner who happens to own a penis as well but he chose that night to take out for a movie and the other six chose to shut her body down gruellingly. We have no idea whether they were in a relationship or not but I feel that he is a hero without a name as well. He identified the attackers after going through that. Imagine he watched them for that hour? What kind of life is he going to live and to me that’s huge. And the men are quiet, no words of support for the fellow on social media or anywhere coming from the men of this world? And they accuse us of making noise about our violations when they choose to ignore their own. The attackers have been arrested. But for me that’s not enough, their names have to come out!!! They are on my hit list; whatever that means!!

My worry is the art of fore play seems to be dwindling isn’t it? Now it’s all about ripping and trashing women’s bodies where our sexuality is a source of punishment instead of pleasure. Ah this I refuse for my body.its special and so is every woman’s!! How is it possible that women in one part of the world enjoy some good loving whilst others are languishing from rape? And then what after that is there any hand that caresses her enough to convince her that she can receive pleasure for her body? Seriously do we really have to start the subject of consensual sexual relationships in the 21st Century?

No maybe we need to let the men of the world know that fore play is important to us where there’s consent and it should always be there. This business of any man thinking that they can insert their penises all the way to our intestines must stop. We deserve the intimacy for ensuring that existence of the human beings continues and giving birth to them and we can’t have those uteruses violated by the same men who want their name to be carried on. And I dare all the men in this world, rape will come to an end and that is going to happen soon!!